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    If this were the case, a real bank would enter a dialogue with the customer and ask them to repay the debt (i.e. If the customer couldn’t, he or she would enter bankruptcy and the debt would be erased. This is nothing more than spiritual bypassing, plain and simple.The main issue I have with the conventional personal growth-related message about forgiveness is that it places the responsibility on the wronged person to do the forgiving, overlooking any responsibility on the part of the person who did the wronging.It’s totally OK not to forgive someone if you’re not ready to.That’s your prerogative; you can forgive or not, whoever is concerned. Click the image to learn more about a positive alternative " data-image-description="" data-medium-file="https://i1com/ fit=683,1024" /According to many people, it’s the answer to most, if not all our problems. One origin of the word forgiveness is in relation to debt. fit=735,1102" data-orig-size="735,1102" data-comments-opened="1" data-image-meta="" data-image-title="If you’re feeling pressured to forgive and forget before you’re ready, forgiveness isn’t the only option. If we don’t embrace forgiveness, the general message goes, we will devolve into bitter misanthropists, trapped in a life of inner turmoil and destined to never achieve our full potential.Acceptance isn’t the same as liking or condoning a behaviour or situation.

    Unlikely, but this is the most common approach to forgiveness in relationships. And, if you don’t forgive this person, you’re denying yourself the chance to be a better person.” Not only that, but it tends to be the case that the bigger the transgression, the more pressure there is to forgive.

    And this is how the personal growth movement talks about forgiveness in relationships too.

    Although it might sound like a cold metaphor, our relationships are like bank accounts too.

    Assuming the best, I understand the potential reasoning behind this: we can’t control other people’s behaviour and we can’t force someone else to do anything they don’t want to do—including make amends.

    We could waste our emotional energy (and our lives) waiting for a resolution that will never come.

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